Today is a really special day. I’ve spent the last 13 months reimagining a service that I feel very passionate about- a service that doesn’t have budget limitations, that is accessible, and that is community-focused.
When I was thinking about what to write for this day, I found myself sharing a lot of backstory. I was hesitant to “go there,” but ultimately I felt like in order to understand my full story, the journey of TPIM, and the journey of TPIM ONLINE, it was important to share the whole story with you. So, bare with me.
It was the summer of 2007, I had just turned 23-years-old and my mom and dad were driving me to the Buffalo airport from the suburbs of Toronto, Canada. I got on a $69 one-way flight to the JFK airport. Meanwhile, my mom, and my dad drove to NYC with my life’s belongings headed to NYC.
Upon arrival, I took a very overpriced taxi ride to my East Village apartment. I would be spending the next two years as a student at the Tisch School Of The Arts.
My parents helped me move in. My mom made me meals for the week, as any Italian mother would. That Sunday night, I walked my parents down my five-story walk up and said goodbye. It felt terrifying and liberating. Although I wasn’t too far from Toronto, and I spoke the language of my new home, I felt removed and distant. I kind of felt like, in some intangible way, that I didn’t belong here. I didn’t have a social security number; therefore, I wasn’t able to buy a cell phone, open up a bank account, or legally work anywhere. I was essentially a visitor.
In 2010, for visa/work reasons, I could no longer remain in the US. I returned to Canada, and ultimately went back to school at 26-years-old for education. During this time, I was able to return to NYC on summer visas working at a West Village summer camp- where I met my now husband, Matt.
Matt did long distance for two years with me, but in 2013 it was time for me to come back to NYC. I convinced him to let me move in with him. At this point, I didn’t have a job. I was working on getting my work visa. Matt supported me while I found a job, and while my visa went through. He took his savings and paid my lawyer fees. He told me that it was an “investment in our future.” I got a job as a program coordinator while making dances with my partner in the evenings to submit to festivals. In 2014, we got engaged and spent 15 months planning our New York City wedding.
During all this time, it had been difficult for me to manage all the back and forth from Toronto to NYC. I had built a dance community in Toronto after my undergrad, but then moved to NYC and started all over. I then built a dance community in NYC, but after my MFA had to go back to Toronto and had lost that community I had built. Then, I built another community in Toronto but I came back to NYC once more. I felt like I was starting all over again as a 29-year-old. I spoke to Matt a lot about how I missed having a community and was struggling to build one.
Eventually, with Matt it felt like I had finally found stable grounds in NYC. His friends became my friends, his family became my family, his world became mine- but I didn’t really have anything of my own.
In February of 2016, shortly after we got married and I had gotten my green card, I started THE PRIVILEGE IS MINE. The name came from the song lyric of a Smiths’ song. It was a song that followed me around my East Village days, and even down the aisle. TPIM in 2016 was a passion-project. It was proof that I could finally do something on my own; and meet people and start some kind of community of my own, on my own.
I was curious to see how far I could take THE PRIVILEGE IS MINE. It was a side hustle while I worked my full time job. It was a creative outlet. My goal was to meet and help as many couples getting married as possible- doing it in a “stress-less” way, in a human, kind, creative and down to earth way. There wasn’t pressure for it to be anything, so it was whatever I wanted it to be, which was chill, fun and no stress planning.
I worked really hard, and put myself out there in really uncomfortable ways. It wasn’t until I met all of you that this “side hustle” and passion-project felt real. It felt like I was truly part of a community. This is when I felt confident enough in what I was doing to push the envelope a little more, and this is how TPIM ONLINE came to life. It was through a desire to give people a community, access to resources, and a feeling of confidence to move towards the best stage of their unique process that TPIM ONLINE was born.
So, without further adieu, I welcome you to the new TPIM ONLINE! It is a community-focused wedding planning subscription platform- truly made for everyone.
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